AA: Cutting and genitalia

Here is a quick update with some Ask Abbey questions. Hope everyone is having a good weekend!

Abbey

Q: Have you always been attracted to just girls and never boys throughout your life, and have you dated females before your current girlfriend?

I’ve always been attracted to girls, so much so that I turned into one. Before my current girlfriend I had 2 other relationships that I would consider serious. One was when I was 18 before I really understood that I was trans, and the other was when I was 21 and starting my transition. The second was transgendered like myself. What really attracts me to people is their appearance/figure, and their personality, NOT what is in their pants. I am attracted to girls regardless of their genitalia.

Q: You mentioned self-harming in your post explaining your period of depression. Had you self-harmed in the past, and did involve cutting, burning, or some other method of injury? Is this something you are concerned about happening the future, or was it a one-time desperate kind of action?

A: Before I had my issues of depression there were a few unrelated instances in the past where I had harmed myself. When I hurt myself I would cut or scratch myself with a knife or a pointed object. I cut mostly on my arms or  hand. The only real visible scar left is one on my hand but it blends in pretty well. I have had thoughts of self-harm since my hospitalization but they are much less frequent and only occur during times of heavy emotional stress or trauma. I think the tendency to look toward self-harm for relief is partially ingrained into my psyche, but with proper coping techniques and a more effective method of release those tendencies can be overcome. It is like unlearning a bad habit or impulse, we come to fall back on them and it takes time and effort to develop healthier habits.